Avoid Jealousy When A New Sibling Arrives

It is almost impossible never to feel jealous. After all, who has not experienced this feeling at some point in life? This is why it can be a real challenge for parents to help their children avoid jealousy when a new sibling arrives. 
Avoid jealousy when a new sibling arrives

When a new sibling arrives in the family, jealousy can be a natural response to the threat of losing the love of their parents. However,  the little ones can learn a lot when they fight for the love of their parents. We will explain to you how to guide them on this journey so that they can avoid jealousy when a new sibling arrives.

What can you do to avoid jealousy among siblings while you wait for your new baby?

The arrival of a new child creates many changes in the family. Your older children may have false expectations while waiting for the baby. Therefore, if you prepare them as early as possible, it can help them avoid jealousy when their new siblings arrive.

The first thing is to let them know you are pregnant before they hear the news from other people. Furthermore,  you need to explain to them in advance that babies need a lot of care because they cannot defend themselves. To help with this, you can show them pictures or videos from when they were babies so they have an easier time understanding it.

Also, try to include them when getting ready for the arrival of the new baby. Some ideas include showing them the ultrasound scans or allowing them to put their hands on your stomach and talk to the baby.

Symptoms of jealousy before the new sibling arrives

Although not all children show jealousy in the same way, some symptoms may include:

  • Anger, anguish, insecurity, sadness. Such feelings may be present as physical symptoms, such as headache, insomnia, or dizziness.
  • Complete rejection  of the new sibling.
  • They  may experience a regression stage  and try to imitate the younger sibling. In this case, they will return to behaviors they have already put behind them, such as sucking on the thumb.
  • They increase to get attention at all costs, often by despising their siblings.
  • They may  exhibit aggressive behavior  to the point where they use verbal or even physical confrontation.
siblings fighting

How to avoid jealousy when a sibling arrives

Of course, there is no magic formula to avoid jealousy when a sibling arrives. However, with the right tools, you can help your children channel this feeling properly. Here are some practical tips:

Set some time aside

Strive to be with your children on one hand to get some quality time. This factor is very important so that they do not feel set aside upon the arrival of the new baby.

Let them help you

Involve them in the care of the new sibling. Depending on the age, you can assign your older children tasks. That way,  you will make them feel like an important part of the family. Of course, if they do not feel like doing so, it is advisable that you do not force them.

Teach them to understand

Teach your children the importance of understanding. It is necessary that they learn to understand the feelings of others. According to this, show them the benefits of being the oldest or the youngest.

Treat them straight

Try to give a balanced treatment to each child. Although love should be shared equally, in many cases you will need to give special treatment. In such cases, the treatment will depend on the age and personality of each child.

Ask for help from other adults

Remind your family and friends not to put the older children aside. Otherwise, your efforts and dedication will be thwarted or even canceled by another person close to the child.

Teach them to share

Help them develop their individuality and respect each other. As they grow up, children should know how to share space with their siblings.

5 things you should not do when dealing with the situation

If you want to avoid jealousy when a new sibling arrives while also fostering family relationships, keep these tips in mind:

You do not need to change the routines

Do not change the routines your children had before the birth of the new baby. Too many changes at the same time can be difficult to assimilate. You need to make sure, as much as possible, that the birth of the new baby does not coincide with a move or school change.

Do not think that they do not want a sibling

Avoid believing that jealousy is a sign that your children do not want their younger siblings. In the majority of cases,  the little ones come to love each other in an unbreakable way with both time and maturity. 

Avoid making comparisons

You should not compare your children. Some of your comments may be a simple observation, but the way you say them can have a strong impact on your children.

pregnant mother and jealous daughter

Be careful with your comments

Avoid phrases that blame or even misinterpret their actions. For example, if you say things like “Stay away from the baby” or “Do not touch the baby,” it may cause your older children to reject the younger sibling more.

Correct the behavior if necessary

Correct bad behavior and do not allow them to behave like that. Some children may seek attention by humiliating, mocking and threatening the infant. While you should not bring shame on their emotions, do not praise them when they behave badly.

In short, it  is virtually impossible to avoid jealousy when a new sibling arrives. However, with patience and affection, you can help your children deal with these emotions. That way, your children will learn to live together, accept their responsibilities and respect each other.

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