How To Avoid Raising An Overprotected Child

Of course, all parents want the best for their children, and they want them to develop important life values. But sometimes they end up raising an overprotected child. How does this happen?

Many parents bring up their children in an overprotective way to prevent them from suffering, so they let them have everything within their reach to make them happy.

But it is a mistake to raise an overprotected child. The main reason is that it does not allow children to develop or learn how to do things themselves or how to overcome difficulties.

All parents are overprotective at some point, and to some extent this is normal. It is an instinct to ensure that our children do not suffer.

But if it happens routinely when we raise our children, we end up causing harm.

Unfortunately, an overprotected child is very common today. It is also common to see parents driving their almost adult children to school, or teenagers asking for their parents’ help when even the smallest problems arise.

At this age, they have almost grown up and this is a real danger.

What does overprotection mean?

There are different patterns of behavior that fall under the umbrella of overprotective parents. See some of the examples here:

• They do not let their children eat alone to avoid clutter. The consequence is that when the child is 2 or 3 years old, he still does not know how to use cutlery himself.
• They still put their children clothes on. The excuse is that then “they get ready to get out the door faster.” The danger of this is that it becomes routine.

• They help them with their hygiene habits, without giving them the opportunity to try for themselves. This can be, for example, washing hands or brushing teeth.
• They constantly remind their children what to do and they make decisions for them that the children themselves are able to make. At the age of 4 and 5 years, children can start choosing their own food, clothes, etc. But there are parents who make these decisions for children because they feel that only they know what is right.
• They interfere in any conversation that the child has with a playmate. And they always favor their own child, even if they are not aware of who the real sinner is or what has happened.
• They clean up the baby’s toys so that the baby does not get too tired.
• They make plans for the child. In other words, they decide what to do and at what times.

• They pack the child’s school bag.
• They call their children several times a day so they know where he is and so they can keep an eye on him.
• They always accompany him, even when he is considered an “adult”. This can, for example, be during an exam or a job interview.

How to avoid raising an overprotected child

The main reason why parents behave in an overprotective way is that they do not understand the benefits of letting their child fend for themselves. When your child asks for help, give him suggestions that will help him solve the problem with his own resources.

Of course, the child will make mistakes, but there is no reason to prevent him from making them. Help him realize that he can achieve things little by little.

It takes time at this age, because you need to remember that you are helping your child to develop and follow a set of guidelines.

It is also a good idea to explain to the child the reason for doing different things so that he can do things alone when there is no adult next to him to explain how to do. We can start with simple things, such as how to set the table, pick things up after yourself, how to participate in simple tasks at home, how to perform personal hygiene, etc.

If your child is shy, you can go out more often so you can help her expand her circle of friends. But it should never be a requirement. Otherwise, it will get worse as children may end up developing a lonely and suspicious personality.

If there are situations that are complicated, it is best to prepare our children, instead of avoiding them.

Where is the limit?

We must not confuse our love for our children with overprotection. It is time for us to establish some criteria.

What most parents try to do is help their children develop by teaching them values ​​that help them grow as a person. 

Children need to get to know the real world so that they are well equipped when they have to stand on their own two feet. Little by little they must learn to be independent, they must learn to draw conclusions and know what to do in every moment, but without established rules.

You need to talk to your child, try to understand him, listen to his problems, doubts and complaints. You have to find solutions together, talk instead of arguing, talk calmly instead of shouting. If you follow these tips, you will teach him about independence instead of raising an overprotected child.