Motherhood After The Second Child
Your first pregnancy is behind you, and once again you find yourself in the same situation, except there is a big difference: This is not your first time. When you have another child, motherhood will be completely different.
When we become mothers for the first time, we live in a world that is parallel to the reality of motherhood. We idealize everything and keep our child in a bubble.
We pretend to be a perfect mother, and luckily the time comes when we finally plant our feet on the ground after we have been given quite a few doses of reality.
This is when the second child comes in. The search for perfection is simply no longer important and we realize how motherhood changes when we go from having a child to two.
Experience is the foundation for raising your second child
You have more experience. You have been through the trial and error phase with your first child, and you know what you want to do, and more importantly, what not to do because you have already learned from your mistakes.
Of course, this child is a completely different person, and what worked with your first child may not work with the second. Still, you still have a head start on this new journey.
Visitation, personal and intimate distance, basic necessities and structuring of family values are things that you already have more or less clear.
You become a practical mother
If you can, take advantage of all the clothes you have stored from your first child. Your baby will be just as covered and well protected if they wear their siblings’ clothes.
You do not have to spend money on clothes you already have. And the money you save will come in handy now that you have two children and twice the expenses.
You are also an expert in managing your time. And you are now able to keep an eye on two children at once while doing something else. You can bathe them at the same time or feed them both in less time than what it would have taken you to feed your first baby.
How will your child handle the arrival of their siblings
The first child, who is used to being the only one and who gets the parents’ love and attention, may feel out of place when a sibling arrives. Suddenly, they have to share their whole world.
A younger sibling causes jealousy in most children. Therefore, it is important to involve the oldest sibling in activities leading up to the baby’s arrival before the time of delivery. It’s to make them feel important.
It is important to value our children in front of family and visitors to avoid negative comments and above all comparisons. Never compare siblings, especially not in front of others.
Keep in mind, in relation to psychology, that children up to the age of six are characteristically egocentric, meaning that they feel like they are the center of the universe. Therefore, they constantly repeat “my, my, my.”
A sibling forces them to share, even something that is important to them as the attention of their parents. And we need to give them time to adapt to their new situation.
Fortunately, children tend to grow out of jealous feelings over time. This emotional state is common in childhood and in virtually all families. Children go through a jealous phase, whether it is short or long, and there is nothing to do but get through it.
Your first child will teach your second child
It seems silly, but it is not. Your second child will be much more aware of the world and learn faster. This is because they have a good teacher: Your first child.
The developmental phase will happen much faster because you are witnessing both children growing at the same time. And before you know it, you will already have a child crawling or running down the aisles.
So you need to enjoy them both more than anything else! Your little baby will soon be your oldest child’s best adventure partner.
Do not forget that one of the most wonderful things you have gained from this second child is experience. This allows you to feel more relaxed and enjoy all these moments to the fullest. Out of focus so much on worrying.
